Yay.

Never assume
Because your assumption is often wrong.
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Today was excellent
For so many reasons.
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I had 2 caffinated drinks that kept my energy level up.
We had a Substitute for French and she let us out early.
We didn't have a quiz in Humanities.
I'm really close to making Venezuela absolutely official.
I won 2 tickets to In The Heights.
I overestimated the amount of homework I have.
November has officially ended.
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I hope all is going well in your life.

Believe

Religion scares me.
I feel like I have to defend myself.
So instead I hide my beliefs.
I don't know how much longer this can last.
I fear the worst.

I wish people were more accepting.

Importances

Dear world,

I received two important things in the mail today.
One awesome Southwest transcript that proclaims to the CLA I no longer need a Mathmatical Thinking class or a Social Science class...woo hoo!!
The other contained two posters of two of my favorite bands: Islands & Band of Horses. It adds more color to my room.

Tomorrow at approximately 10:30 in the morning I depart for home. It shall be an enjoyable experience. I have lots of homework, but whatever.

I am in the process of doing laundry. When switching it over I noticed that one of my white shirts turned pink, and then remembered I had just got a new sweatshirt. This saddens me. I don't need pink. I no longer like that color.

Registration is in a week for me. This is unfortunate because I am one of the last people to sign up. I'm trying to mentally save spots in the classes I want, but I'm not quite sure if that's going to work. Oh well.


In the meantime,
I wish you well.
Happy Thanksgiving.

Life is Waiting

On December 3rd I will tell the world that I officially know what I want to do.
On that day a lot more opportunities will open up,
And some people will start taking me more seriously.

Today is the day I have my last class for a week.
It doesn't mean the end of work or of life,
But I can finally rest my brain.

Tomorrow I have a day off in Minneapolis.
This is exciting.
I love my new home.

Thursday is Thanksgiving with my family.
I don't quite feel like we have much in common
But I still love and enjoy them.

Psychology tells me personality is mostly genetic,
I don't believe that with a lot of my characteristics,
But I also don't know where my personality came from.

27 Days until this Semester is over.
I'm really glad.
This semester was filled with plenty of unappreciated work.

Next semester will hopefully be what I want it to be.
I sign up for classes late so that might not happen,
But I'm optimistic.

I've seen beautiful film and beautiful art the past 2 days.
I want the rest of my life to be filled with such occasions
As well as lots of traveling and adventure.

That's all I really expect out of my life.

Goodbye. Don't fail.

Voy a sacar una A en mi examen de Espanol 1003.

The Struggle with Life

Dear Reader,

The end is drawing near.
I've held on stong for this long,
And will continue to persevere.

Grasping the straggling strings
On the neverending unwinding rope,
With the tips of my fingers.

Reaching one arm above the next,
In the struggle to make it to the top,
Or even just to survive.

Some others have made it,
The rest have fallen down
Into the dark valley below.

The damp soil rubs against my knees
Smearing my legs in cold dirt
As I kick to get a better hold.

The rocks pierce my feet
And the blood drips off to a place unknown
Where the rest have gone.

I close my eyes
Wanting nothing more than a rest from the struggle
Just a moment to take a deep breath.

As I make my way to the top
With my muscles sore and throbbing
Sweat drips from my brow and crawls down my face.

Minutes pass and I continue to struggle,
Anticipating the moment when one way or the other,
I will be put to rest and held in the arms of relaxation.



The semester is almost over.
Life is loved.
Times are tough.

A Poem Entitled Untitled Poem

I don't know or understand a lot of things,
But there are some that I do.

I can't possibly enjoy ever second in life,
But I choose to enjoy as many as possible.

I can't possibly know where my life is headed,
But I know it will be beautiful.

Some things aren't meant to be,
But some things are.

My dreams have fallen for a man whose name I do not know,
And I'm certain I'll never ask what it is
Even though you are just an arms reach twice every week.

My friend, I'll be with you until the end of time,
Knowing very well I can be replaced.

My friend, you'll be with me forever and ever,
Knowing very well I might change my mind.

It's amazing how hard it can be to say something,
Even though you want to say it so bad.

Rawwrrrhhh

Fact: My title has changed.
Fact: I simply wanted to change the font color so you could read it,
Fact: But it wouldn't let me do that.
Fact: So now my title is "Ninja See....Ninja Don't"
Fact: Clever, Lame, and Funny is what I'm going for...
Fact: I'll probably only get one of those three though.

Hecho: I'm going to Venezuela this summer.
Hecho: I am a very happy person and have completely developed a sense of balance...
except for diet and exercise as of this moment...
Hecho: I'm saving that for next semester.

I wish I knew if you existed.
I've always had my doubts.

Seriously: Now please, stop your creeping and get on with your life.
Your productivity is obviously not where it should be.

O O
""
It makes me sad no matter what I do...
His mustache won't line up with his face.
This is not a metaphor...
It's true.

O O
""""

FACT:...that doesn't work either.

Where Is Home?

It's been a long time since I cried.
I don't like how people expect so much out of me.
I wish I could focus all my energy on one thing, but the world won't allow that.
Right now I wish I had someone with arms I could cry into...
I don't want someone to talk to or someone to apologize for my own feelings...
I'm beginning to wonder if coming home this weekend will really be as epic as I had hoped.
My mom is already frustrating me and not understanding anything.
Meaningless events have already been blown into world extravaganzas...
I wish you could hold a mirror to someone's face and show them how ridiculous they are.
There are so many ridiculous people in this world.
And, the sad thing is they will never know how ridiculous they are.
I have so much to do tonight, but my emotions won't let me do anything but think.
A recent realization is also that I want a relationship,
But I find that idea impossible because for it to be worth it I would have to find this guy that probably doesn't even exist.
Recently if I had Esteban's number I would have called him (just to talk of course...I know we aren't getting back together).
It's probably a good thing I don't have it.
I don't want to end up saying things I don't mean just because I'm a little sad.
I feel like throwing up, yet also feel like eatting.
I hate being vulnerable.
But, it's been so long since I've felt like this that it doesn't really matter to me.
I don't care if you know how I feel...even though you can't possibly know everything.
I feel a little better now after listening to angry music and typing this.
I will survive.
And now I will put on my smile and go read...
Because that's just how it works.

Ze Week-End

I've enjoyed this weekend so much.
------------
-I've met cool new people.
One of them I will probably spending a great deal of time with and he also lives in my dorm so it's convenient.
-I had delicious delicious French food.
Cheeses, Fruits, Delicious Bread, Fondue with Mushrooms, Bread, and Apples, French French Fries (called Pommes Frites), and amazing lemonade and probably more that I can't remember...all of it was presented really fancy.
-Saw a crap ton of movies.
Funny Games, Heavyweights, Beauty and the Beast, Moulin Rouge, and lots of episiodes of Will & Grace
-Went to dairy queen really late.
-Had a sleepover in my dorm.
-Got up for brunch at 1:20.
-Walked to the Walker...
My legs killed and I had blisters, but we gave this guy an amazing tour of Minneapolis and had lots of fun doing so.
-Watched Andrew almost get raped...which was really freaky, but an interesting story.
-Watched the very original French Beauty and the Beast...which is very different from the Disney, and very entertaining...I want to see it again because I fell asleep during part of the ending because of lack of sleep.
-----------
Today the weather is crappy and by that I mean cloudy.
I did terrible on a French test I actually thought I did well on besides one little part...I don't understand and I'm hoping she made a mistake because seriously I knew my shit and didn't deserve a C...and if I got it, I guess my test average with the C included is still a strong B...so I'll get over it.
I really want to see the dance thing at Northrop on November 12th. I'll go with someone for sure.
I don't want this weekend of craziness to ever end. I do want a little sleep though...tonight I must go to bed before 5...otherwise death will be upon me.
------------
I miss you.
Greatly.

Things of Humor

Bonjour dearest friend.
-----------
I am feeling about every emotion ever, except for saddness because it's pretty much the lamest emotion to ever be invented. Humor would be the one noun that I would use to describe my mood today...one might even go as far to use the adjective humourous to describe my mood, but I find that it looks awkward so I don't use it too often.
-----------
Today many things of humor happend...nothing amazing, but definately mentionable. First of all, when waiting to cross the crosswalk I had a bike stop and wave me across then wait for me to get to the other side of the crosswalk...I was really confused by this, but it was a super nice gesture that made my day.
-----------
Later I was going to walk to Middlebrook and I noticed the Bridge Connector was waiting in it's usual location. I thought I would finally take advantage of this beautiful mode of transportation so I started speed walking to the point of my legs aching and the stuff in my backpack making a weird noise with every step...pretty sure my backpack was out of breath. Once I entered the bus I sat down and waited for another 10 minutes for it to take off. I felt a little ridiculoso, but it was still faster.
-------------
After lunch I noticed that someone had spilled Jello, stepped in it, then walked away leaving a clear footprint of jello stuff. Someone that walked by shouted: "A clue!" Everyone that heard it appreciated it (me) then everyone I explained it to also appreciated it.
-------------
As I was walking back to my dorm from middlebrook a series of funny thoughts ran through my head. First off, a girl was wearing a nice jacket with the zipper zipped but not the cool button things...the thought that ran through my head was: "Button up your coat and stop being such a hooker. Warm weather does not make prostitution legal." I'd explain this in detail, but I just think it's funny so enjoy. The second thought to enter my head was "Yes I'm naked under these clothes. Stop judging." I really want to shout that to anyone that gives me a weird look. I think it would be hilarious.
--------------
Once I arrived at my dorm I realized I really had to pee. Unfortunately the janitor was cleaning our bathrooms. I seriously just stood in my dorm and paced around in mini-circles then would open my door and look out...often making awkward eye contact with the janitor. I decided to go down to floor 3. I realized then that the floor 3 bathrooms are much different than the floor 4 bathrooms. It was weird. When I flushed the handle thing got stuck and it just continued to make that annoying toilet noise and I laughed at it for a second...then I decided to make it stop. I washed my hands like a lady and went back to my room.
-------------
Amongst all these things of humor I had a French test...which went fairly well I think? Good one might even say even though I'm not sure...it was rushed. And in approximately 2 hours 19 minutes and 31 seconds I have a Spanish presentation on Pablo Picasso. It shall be good I hope.
--------------
This weekend will be fun!
It's the weekend! Get off your butt and have some fun!

Fancy Feast?...I think so.

Today I indulged in a very filling dorm meal in celebration of Thursday. After tomorrow I have survived. I have a French written exam tomorrow morning and a Spanish Presentation in the evening. I hope both go well. So far this week hasn't been a fail by any means.

Yesterday I daydreamed in Spanish about the meaning of life and what I believe in. I think I've figured everything out. One of these days I will write it all out here, but I think I'll wait until I have it properly organized.

Before assembling my meal, while I was opening the triangle of cheese it slipped out and flew into the air and I caught it. It was by far one of the most interesting things I did all day. Sad, I know.

Next to me is a slip of paper that reads: Congratulations! You have finished your 1003 Oral Presentation...blah blah blah. I can't wait until this paper is true. I hate presentations. But, Pablo Picasso will treat me well tomorrow I hope.

Now, I leave you.

Goodnight.

Un Peu de Francais

Hey there. I have a French oral exam tomorrow so therefore I plan on typing what I want to say to help me memorize...so here it goes.

Bonjour. Ca va? Qu'est-ce que tu fais un week-end typique? Le week-end je sors avec des amis, je dors tard et regarde la tele. Est-ce que tu fais des activites avec tes amis? Nous allons du cinema et faisons la fete. Qu'est-ce que tu aimes faire le week-end? J'aime sortir avec des amis, dormir tard, et aller au cinema. Est-ce que tu vas a la bibliotheque? Je vais a la bibliotheque. Est-ce que tu vas au cafe? Je vais au cafe. Est-ce que tu as des project pour le week-end porchain? Le week-end porchain je vais diner au restaurant et sortir avec des amis. Qu'est-ce que tu veux faire ce week-end? Je veux dormir tard. Qu'est ce que tu vas faire vendredi? Je vais etudier. De quelle ville viens-tu? Je vien de Minneapolis. Comment est ta ville d'origine? Lake City est beaucoup petit. Quels batiments y-a-t-il dans ta ville d'origine? Lake City a un parc, un bureau de poste, et une eglise. Ou se trouvent-ils? Lake City est entre Red wing et Rochester en Minnesota. Comment est ton quartier? Mon quartier a beaucoup personnes. Qu'est-ce qu'on peut faire dans ce quartier? Nous pouvons aller au cinema, faire un promenade, et diner au restaurant. Que moyen de transport est-ce que tu recommandes pour se deplacer? Je recommande l'autobus. Comment viens-tu a la fac? Je vien en l'autobus.

I'm becoming quite the pro...right, right? Well, I'm not "nervous" for this test, but I'm a little concerned about it. I hope it goes okay. I need to study a lot.

Today was a really decent Tuesday if you were wondering. I spent time with Jon & James then Mike then Jon, then Mark, and later Riley. All this took place before 6:15 so therefore I now have plenty of time to complete my homework.

I should be getting another package tomorrow. If not tomorrow, then Thursday. This makes me happy again. I love mail.

Today someone complimented my handwriting and it made my day a little. Watching The Office during post-lunch time with Mike is fun.

Now that you know me you can start refering to it as the Post-Krista era.

The End.

♥

I am prepared to conquer any obstacle that dares to confront me.
--------------
When I don't know what to say I will smile.
It's what I do when I feel defeated and unable to defend myself.
It's a flaw of mine that probably saves friendships.
Though, most of the time, I wish I could do something other than smile.
I wish I could do something other than that sigh like I'm joking
Or that look nobody knows the meaning of.
In the meantime smiling seems easier.
One of these days it will be different.
---------------
I am, however, battling no new feelings.
I am getting more content every day.
Certain things just seem to never go away though.
I've come to just accept that.
---------------
I got a package in the mail.
It made me smile inside.
---------------
I miss you.
---------------
♥

Speechless

Sometimes I imagine moments of my life as if they are part of a movie.
Most of the time they are moments without words.
-----------
I have so much to say, yet am unaware how to express it.
-----------
I'll leave it to this:
I had an
-amazing morning: filled with watching cartoons and eatting pizza rolls in bed with lots of blankets.
-odd afternoon: that felt as if it was nonexistent.
-a fun evening: complete with movie with a friend & junk food.
-an odd night: in which I have so much to accomplish yet no motivation to do it...I have everything that needs to be done completed though so it's not a big deal.
----------
I had a nightmare last night where I was walking downtown with a group of three friends whos names I will not say. One of them got behind and didn't see a car coming and crossed the sidewalk. A car flew by and hit him really hard...so hard that blood was everywhere. I collapsed at my other friend's feet and started crying. I'm not sure exactly what it means, but yet I probably do. My subconscious doesn't really like you, but it cares about you. I apologize. The image will forever be in my head because it was the most bloody dream I have ever had in my life and very realistic. If I'm near you I will be sure to watch for traffic.
-----------
This week is going to hurt me. French is going to be absolutely ridiculous. I have lots of Psychology homework. Plenty of Spanish homework along with a presentation. And humanities there is always so much reading and a definite quiz.
------------
Monday: One more day closer to Friday. This weekend will be fun.
------------
Goodbye.
You're beautiful.